Touch
by SaixMoon34
Summary: How can one understand emotions when it is impossible for him to feel them? Does it become lost in translation, or can it be understood through hands-on experience?


DISCLAIMER: I do not own Kingdom Hearts or any of its characters.

xXx

It felt like a thousand daggers floating around, piercing all who dared to cross their paths. The tension, the uncertainty, the boredom all became too much for one to handle. It was this way every day in the Castle That Never Was. Those that had missions embarked on each without hesitation, needing anything to get out and do something. Their turmoil with the Keyblade master had come to a stalemate: there was no word from the boy and there was no trace of him anywhere. Had he been killed? It had not been considered as likely, though it couldn't be ruled out either. Instead of pursuing him as Organization XIII did, they had no choice but to focus on their own endeavors until his existence resurfaced.

In one room in particular, there was activity. The Superior of the In-Between, an owner of everything that was nothing and a master of nothing itself, was in his office with literature of the emotional nature. He had yet to understand emotion, and while he had the most recollection of any members, it was not good enough. One rather large book was open and next to it was a notepad and a pen, words being almost sloppily copied in the haste of agitation and curiosity. Xemnas couldn't fathom why the heart was such a difficult concept for him to grasp, and the more he tried, the more he realized that he knew nothing. He eventually closed the book and leaned back in his seat, the words failing to strike him how they needed to. It was somewhat ironic: how none of the members particularly understood emotion, yet had all been versed enough in it to "feel."

After Xemnas' blank contemplation, there was an acute knock at his door. He broke from his stupor and stared at the door for a moment. He didn't know who would be up at that hour, an ungodly three in the morning, but he could not judge. If he was up at that time, any other member was perfectly capable of it as well. "Come in," he said after a second round of knocks. In stepped a hooded figure who slowly closed the door and walked over to stand before the Superior. Xemnas leaned back in his seat some and watched the hooded figure, both wondering who it was and what reason they had to be there. It being so late, all the members should have been asleep or at least quiet in their rooms, seeking entertainment from themselves or one another.

The hooded figure removed the hood and showed that it was Lexaeus. In the process, Xemnas realized just how much stress his mind had endured if he honestly couldn't tell that it was Lexaeus who had walked in, he being the largest member of the Organization and none-too-quiet on his feet. The man took a seat across from his Superior and looked him in the eyes, leaning forward slightly. His blue eyes were seas of determination, with the strength of a thousand men, though the gentleness of a thousand feathers. His presence was not random; it was something he had begun to do fairly often. He came to see his Superior and his Superior wanted him there. He was among the few sane members so he was always a reassurance to their fate.

Lexaeus held a hand out after the observation and pulled the notebook from Xemnas to himself. He rotated it and began reading over the somewhat illegible handwriting. The more stressed the Superior became, the sloppier his handwriting, it seemed. Lexaeus cracked the slightest bit of a smirk at this and leaned back, looking to Xemnas. Between the two of them, they had always been close. As Aeleus and Xehanort, and now as Lexaeus and Xemnas. Their relationship was something that could never be explained, since they simply lacked the knowledge to do so, but it didn't matter. After becoming Nobodies, it had almost become a marriage of convenience; however, it worked out for both parties. Over the extensive amount of time that the two had spent together, all mode of communication had changed. Being a man of few words, Lexaeus resorted to looks to say what he needed, and Xemnas had caught on to this. They didn't need to speak; it was a simple look or gesture that spoke volumes.

A few moments had passed, and Xemnas pulled the notepad back to himself, rotating it back to face him. He refused to look over the notes again, not wanting to be reminded of his mental agony. He simply looked to Lexaeus, curious to know why he had come. While they spent time together, it was rare that the Silent Hero visited after midnight. He had early morning workout routines, so he had to get his rest early. Nonetheless, there he was, in his office at three in the morning. Lexaeus gave no direct indication as to why he was there; he just leaned back in the chair and observed all the books on Xemnas' desk and the pen that had been so angrily set down moments before. It seemed like hours had gone by in those moments alone, but it had been a mere two minutes.

Then, a sudden movement. Lexaeus had leaned forward completely, resting one elbow on the desk while his other hand stretched to Xemnas, its large stature slowly engulfing the more delicate hand of the Superior.

A simple touch.

Xemnas looked to the hands, and then looked to Lexaeus. Although they had no hearts, there was always the spark between them whenever they touched. Whenever they got closer, whenever their touching increased. It didn't take long for a massive thumb to caress the hand under it, for the entire hand to slip under and take the other into its grasp. It was the power of earth meeting the power of nothingness, their clash solidifying any doubt in unity. It wasn't long before Lexaeus had stood to his feet, pulling the leader up with him. He had gone around the table and moved the hand from Xemnas' to the small of his back. The temperature of the office rose without reluctance and both Nobodies felt it immediately.

They had shared intimacy previously, so this was nothing new. After a hard day's work, each would come to the other for the comfort and release that they would never achieve with anyone else or themselves. Bodies melded closer and lips connected under the acceptance of the unknown feelings, smaller hands roaming the powerful chest presented before them. Despite being the Superior, Xemnas had a level of subservience to Lexaeus. During the day, they never made contact whatsoever and what little they did have; it was Xemnas' orders and Lexaeus' obedience along with the other members. But during the night, it was Xemnas who took the orders. Their time together often turned sexual, and Xemnas brought himself to be what Lexaeus wanted him to be. Whether it took place in the exercise room, in the office or in the bedroom, Xemnas belonged to Lexaeus completely.

Cloaks were discarded on the floor next to the desk and the smaller Nobody was sitting atop the desk, next to those confusing books, with the bigger one standing directly in front of him, between his legs. Xemnas placed his hands on either of Lexaeus' hips and pulled himself forward, pressing his lips ever so softly to one of the other's pectoral muscles. The impressive contours of the man's build never went unappreciated and Xemnas was sure to show his admiration of such. He felt a large hand reaching behind him and warmth engulfed a buttock in a tender squeeze. It was notable how patient Lexaeus could be with almost anything and while that proved to be unsettling in some situations, it was comforting in most. The warm embrace of the Silent Hero was all Xemnas could ever ask for and everything else simply came as a bonus.

Hands began to roam more quickly and Xemnas was eventually flush on his back. His lower garments had been tossed aside and he lay naked in front of his lover. He never failed to savor the hungry gleam in those cerulean eyes whenever he was nude before him. It made a heat burn inside his midsection and the small amount of fear that had built from it only worked further to his thighs. The lips had sealed his again as a large hand went to work in preparation. Small grunts and whimpers echoed the room for a few moments, then it was quiet again as Lexaeus stood and positioned them both. The first thrust was always a bit rough, but the reassurance behind it made it more endurable. Ebony nails dug roughly into ivory skin, leaving behind rough red marks and scratches as bodies became one under Kingdom Hearts. A deep breath and a slow embrace calmed the tension and pain converted to pleasure after seconds of endurance.

Lexaeus pulled Xemnas closer to him to save his back the soreness and he began a slow pace, never wanting to hurt him. Over the years, he had come to truly respect Xemnas for who he was and his authoritative stature. He felt honored to have the Superior as his own, as if he were a gift. This appreciation did not go unnoticed as they eventually moved. Xemnas was positioned on his hands and propped a leg over his desk before he felt the force inside of him again. He couldn't help but give an audible acknowledgment of its presence and he gripped to the other edge of the desk, eyes closing and jaw lax under the heat of their passion. It didn't need to be rough or necessarily fast; just enough for the two of them to clear their stress and gain the satisfaction of spending time together. Xemnas could never last very long so as he felt his endowment reaching its conclusion; he shuddered and clenched back, giving Lexaeus the signal. Both of the larger man's hands made their way back to their Superior's hips and thrusts became much faster and deeper, making quick work of their target.

Xemnas collapsed on the table, catching his breath as the man behind him retreated to their clothing. He never minded the lack of extraordinary stamina, since he never viewed it as much of a lust thing. Lexaeus had no heart to say that he loved Xemnas, but he probably would have if he had. All the time they spent together and all the sweet nothings they exchanged through mere touch and sight were powerful enough to disintegrate even the biggest concerns. Xemnas sat up and moved over to his clothes and Lexaeus, fixing them on himself. He had to do his laundry the next morning, so he wasn't concerned with the after effects of their lovemaking, as well as the semen from which he had splashed onto the delicate carvings of his desk, and even a few remnants landed onto his irritated pen strokes.

As he and Lexaeus finished getting dressed, they exchanged looks. The bigger leaned down, pressing his lips passionately to those of the ebony leader, arms wrapping tightly around his back. A promise of protection and eternal loyalty surged between them and both knew the other would always be there. It failed to be simply sex with them since both were intelligent non-beings with more knowledge than they believed. A reluctance resonated in their retreat from each other, but Lexaeus placed a hand to Xemnas' cheek before pulling away. Lexaeus gave a small nod to him before turning to leave the office.

Through their nights together, they became increasingly more romantic and trusting of one another, the natural progression of human emotion, despite it being something they biologically lacked. They didn't exist in reality, but to each other, they were everything and more. The extent of their thoughts blew their minds and at that moment, as Lexaeus reached the door, they knew that they would always have "love." They cared for each other too much to even let their lack of hearts interfere and while they couldn't fully understand it anymore, it was clear that something rare was there. Xemnas walked over to Lexaeus as he made his departure from the office and grabbed one of his hands, leaning up and kissing him once more. He then pulled back, his hand pulling back with him and he took a step back, speaking very softly, "Sleep well, Lexaeus."

"Sleep well as well, Xemnas," came the only response from the Silent Hero that night, packaged with one final kiss before the two broke away for the rest of the night.


End file.
